smash

houseofhobo:

Feeling taken advantage of is loathsome for most people, but that can’t happen if you’re truly compassionate. Compassion motivates you to do what you believe in your heart is right for you and your loved ones. If you act according to your deepest values, you cannot be exploited, even if your partner violates his or hers with bad behavior.

Just as you cannot be manipulated if you are compassionate, neither can you manipulate others. Being kind to someone so they will do something for you in return is an investment, not compassion. Like all investments, it’s risky.

Compassion doesn’t condone or excuse bad behavior, because it’s not about behavior. The word means, “to suffer with.” Compassion focuses on the pain and human frailty that make people behave badly, while recognizing that the continuation of bad or irresponsible behavior will hurt them more. The worst thing you can do for an abusive person is excuse the abuse, which leads to self-loathing caused by the continual violation of his or her deepest values. Neither is it compassionate to allow children to behave irresponsibly, lest they painfully learn how cruel the world can be to the irresponsible.

via

 i wonder if my parents have read anything like this.

califaithful:

The Type A and Type B personality theory is a personality type theory that describes a pattern of behaviors that were once considered to be a risk factor for coronary heart disease. Since its inception in the 1950s, the theory has been widely popularized and also widely criticised for its scientific shortcomings.

Type A individuals can be described as impatient, time-conscious, concerned about their status, highly competitive, ambitious, business-like, aggressive, having difficulty relaxing; and are sometimes disliked by individuals with Type B personalities for the way that they’re always rushing.^[1] They are often high-achieving workaholics who multi-task, drive themselves with deadlines, and are unhappy about delays. Because of these characteristics, Type A individuals are often described as “stress junkies.” Type B individuals, in contrast, are described as patient, relaxed, and easy-going, generally lacking any sense of urgency. Because of these characteristics, Type B individuals are often described as apathetic and disengaged. There is also a Type AB mixed profile for people who cannot be clearly categorized.

- Source

TYPE A

Impatient [ ]

Time-Conscious [X]

Concerned about status [X]

Highly Competitive [ ]

Ambitious [ ]

Business-Like [ ]

Aggressive [ ]

Difficulty Relaxing [ ]

Multi-Tasking Workaholic [ ]

Drives myself with deadlines [ ]

Unhappy about delays [X] (Unless it’s a car part I ordered… or a promised booty call…)

TYPE B

Patient [X]

Relaxed [X]

Easy-Going [X]

Lacking a sense of urgency [ ]

Apathetic [X]

Disengaged [X]

uprmgmt:

lol going to get food soon… as soon as I figure out what it is that I want…

 whatchu know about Lupe Fiasco?

gojira:

“I find these scraps of writing all over the house… they are a glimpse into his mind, the disquiet he tries to hide from me. Where is everyone? What’s going on? How lost he feels. “

“My father often tells me he wants to die. He says it’s time for him to go, that he’s been around too long. It’s odd, because part of me wants him to go too. This is no life for him, living in the twilight of half memories. But he is the only really close family I have left. You see, I’m an only child. After him, that’s it. The other day, when he said he wanted to die, I told him that the problem was that he had no exercised his entire life, and was in great shape. He looked at me, raised his finger, and said: ‘Next time around, I’m going to stay in bed!’”

“I love moments like these. For just a few minutes, everything almost feels normal again. My mum isn’t dead, and we’re not pretending she’s gone to Paris. She’s popped out to the store, and she’ll be back shortly. How sweet that would be.”

“My father is funny. I put these little cookies on his chest, and he said ‘look at my titties!’ How can you not laugh?”

“Because my parents had me so late, my dad was essentially retired when I was growing up. But for my ambitious, driven father, he wasn’t retired at all, just working on his next career. Being an artist. I have so many memories of him listening to opera, sketching, painting, sculpting. Although he doesn’t paint anymore, he still sees. he still has the artistic impulse. He was admiring the sunset, saying that he could make a ‘whole series’ of paintings around these wonderful colors… The urge is still there, even if the physical ability is not… “

“I’ve always been amazed at my father’s love for my mother. It’s a constant force, like sunlight, or gravity. He never stops talking about her. His gratitude for her love, for the relationship they had. For the way which she was the glue for our little family. I loved her so much, but she drove me crazy. My hair was too short. My shirt was too wrinkled. I wasn’t standing straight. She called me up once and told me not to go outside, because it was dangerously windy! Now that she’s gone, I realize that I spent a lifetime resisting her influence, and now, I miss it. I think she was right about almost everything… She would have been very happy to hear me say those words. I’ve always been amazed at my father’s love for my mother. It’s a constant force, like sunlight, or gravity. He never stops talking about her. His gratitude for her love, for the relationship they had. For the way which she was the glue for our little family. I loved her so much, but she drove me crazy. My hair was too short. My shirt was too wrinkled. I wasn’t standing straight. She called me up once and told me not to go outside, because it was dangerously windy! Now that she’s gone, I realize that I spent a lifetime resisting her influence, and now, I miss it. I think she was right about almost everything… She would have been very happy to hear me say those words.”

“NOTHING cheers up my dad, like stories of my success. So if he’s down or obsessing about something. I’ll immediately conjure up a blossoming career. I”m shooting for The New York Times. The New Yorker. Multi-million dollar advertising campaigns. Sometimes it’s true, sometimes not. But it doesn’t matter. The important thing is to fill him with as much joy as I can. His face bursts with happiness. He’ll say “I have to tell ALL my friends, my son is famous!”

“So my dad died yesterday. I spent the whole night with him, holding his hand, listening to him breath, wondering when it would be his last. He died in his bed, at home, with Carla and I next to him. For the last three years, I’ve been waiting. Terrified that he would die when I was away. I didn’t want him to go on his own, surrounded by strangers, or plugged into machines. I know it sounds odd, but I’m so grateful for the way it happened. I feel lucky to have had these last three years. To have nothing left unsaid. To know that we loved each other nakedly, without embarassment. To have felt his pride at my accomplishments. And to have discovered how funny he was. What an amazing, amazing gift.”

“I’d like to thank everyone who read this. I never thought it would interest anyone but me. I feel deeply honored to have touched so many hearts. I’ve read every email, every comment. I know that if my dad had understood what I was doing, he would have been very pleased. He also would have wanted people to remember that his story is a story about life. My father had no time for growing old. He was like a river. Always in motion, flowing forward with loose-limbed vigor. Sweeping past every obstacle with a smile, dancing and shimmering in the sun. Every door was there to be opened. Every window to be peered into. Just last week, on his 99th birthday, I asked him how old he thought he was. Grinning, he said: “22 and a half?” Now he’s gone to Paris, to meet my mum.

http://www.dayswithmyfather.com/

and stick to it. my friend just convinced me to go see this new moon crap-on-a-sticktastic movie tonight. i can’t stop thinking about how lame Kristen Stewart and her acting will be. i don’t wanna see sparkly vampires and computer animated werewolves.

i put some food away in the fridge last night. when i woke up this afternoon i went downstairs, opened up the fridge to get my food. it was gone. so i asked to anyone who was within earshot, “who ate my food?!” my sister, not the sister in question, replied, “what?” don’t “what?” me. you heard exactly what i said. frickin crap happens all the time in this house. that’s why i have to hide food. this changed my whole mood.

grrr.